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meaning

March 27, 2011 by Marcus Gottlieb

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
…I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awake in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft star-shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there. I did not die.

[Read more…] about i am not there

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Filed Under: ageing, meaning, nature, parents, relationships Tagged With: ageing, death, meaning, nature, parents

February 21, 2011 by Marcus Gottlieb

I find this a moving anecdote from ‘Learned Helplessness’ by C. Peterson, S.F. Maier & M.E.P. :

On its two floors, the Arden House Nursing Home had about 100 patients in residence. Their average age was eighty. Two psychologists, Judy Rodin and Ellen Langer, decided to introduce some additional good things to this particular nursing home: movies and decorative plants.

At a meeting on the first floor, the director told the patients:

I was surprised to learn that many of you don’t realise the influence you have over your lives here. It’s your life and you can make of it whatever you want. You made the decisions before you came here, and you should be making them now. I want to take this opportunity to give each of you a present from Arden House. [Plants are passed around, and each patient chooses one.] The plants are yours to keep and take care of as you like. One last thing, I wanted to tell you that we’re showing a movie two nights next week, Thursday and Friday. You should decide which night you’d like to go.

[Read more…] about being in charge

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Filed Under: ageing, change, esteem Tagged With: ageing, change, esteem, meaning

January 12, 2011 by Marcus Gottlieb

How can I prepare for a fulfilling life? (letter from an enquiring girl, aged 15)

Virginia Satir wrote this reply:

  • I am me.
  • In all the world there is no one else exactly like me. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. I have some parts like others but I don’t add up to be exactly like anyone else. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone chose it.
  • I own everything about me – my body, including everything it does; my mind, including all its thoughts and ideas; my eyes, including the image of all my eyes behold; my feelings, whatever they may be – anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement; my mouth and all that comes out of it – words polite, sweet or rough – correct and incorrect; my voice, loud or soft; and all my actions, whether they be to others or myself.
  • [Read more…] about i am me

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    Filed Under: esteem Tagged With: esteem, meaning

    January 2, 2011 by Marcus Gottlieb

    As the New Year reminds us of our gradually advancing age, let’s just consider the not inconsiderable, brighter side (with gratitude to Anthony):

  • In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first
  • It’s harder and harder for harassment charges to stick
  • Kidnappers are not very interested in you
  • No one expects you to run into a burning building
  • People call at 9 pm and ask, ‘Did I wake you?’
  • People no longer view you as a hypochondriac
  • There’s nothing left to learn the hard way
  • Things you buy now won’t wear out
  • [Read more…] about benefits of growing older

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    Filed Under: assumptions, body, esteem, meaning Tagged With: assumptions, body, esteem, meaning

    December 21, 2010 by Marcus Gottlieb

    This is from Marianne Williamson’s A Return To Love. There’s a myth around that Nelson Mandela quoted this passage during his inaugural presidential speech. Just a myth. No matter – I don’t think it needs anything to add to its lustre!

    Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
    Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
    It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
    We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
    Actually, who are you not to be?
    You are a child of God.
    Your playing small does not serve the world.
    There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
    We are all meant to shine, as children do.
    We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
    It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
    And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
    As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

    List of pages

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      • Addictions & Dependencies
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      • Male victims of domestic violence
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    • Work & Career Issues Therapy
      • Assertiveness Skills
      • Career transition counselling coaching
      • Counselling for Coping with Prejudice & Discrimination
      • Work Life Balance Counselling
      • Workplace Bullying & Harassment

    Filed Under: esteem Tagged With: esteem, meaning

    December 13, 2010 by Marcus Gottlieb

    Everything except language
    knows the meaning of existence.
    Trees, plants, rivers, time
    know nothing else. They express it
    moment by moment as the universe.
    Even this fool of a body lives it in part
    and would have full dignity
    within it but for the
    ignorant freedom of my
    talking mind.

    with affectionate thanks to Jo Harvey

    List of pages

    • About Marcus Gottlieb West London Psychotherapist & Counsellor
    • Boarding School Survivors Therapy
      • Boarding School Survivors & Relationship Issues
      • Boarding School Survivors and Bullying
      • Boarding School Survivors and Depression
      • Boarding School Survivors Workshops in London
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      • body image issues and body hatred
      • Bullying & Harassment
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      • Chronic fatigue IBS ME Psychosomatic Symptoms
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      • Couples Counselling in Notting Hill
      • Depression & Mood Swings
      • Eating Disorders & Intuitive Eating
      • Family & Parental Issues
      • Gay Couples Therapy
      • LGBTQ and sexual orientation
      • lonliness isolation abandonment
      • Low Self Confidence & Low self Esteem
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      • Assertiveness Skills
      • Career transition counselling coaching
      • Counselling for Coping with Prejudice & Discrimination
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      • Workplace Bullying & Harassment

    Filed Under: body, nature Tagged With: body, meaning, nature

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    Pesso Boyden Group with accredited practitioners Deborah Clarke and Marcus Gottlieb

    Pesso Boyden Group with accredited PBSP practitioners Deborah Clarke and Marcus Gottlieb

    Pesso Boyden Therapy (‘PBSP’) is a philosophical process for becoming whole.

    It is a respectful, interactive group process that heals by embedding new memories in the brain and in the body

    Most people consciously or unconsciously have memories – explicit or implicit – of 

    1. deficits 

    2. traumas 

    3. having to take care of others when we were too young – e.g. protecting a sibling, providing the joy in the life of an unhappy parent, unconsciously becoming the ‘spouse’ of a widowed parent, or making the world right after hearing stories of injustice. 

    When any of these three categories of memory appear in the client’s work, the client and therapist work together to externalise them, in order to illuminate the client’s ways of handling life and to facilitate change. The client is always in charge of this process – people and incidents from the client’s past will be symbolised in the here-and-now either by people in the group or by objects in the room, all chosen and placed by the client. 

    The therapist then works with the client to facilitate an antidote to what happened in the past – a new memory which provides what the client needed at that particular time in their past, from a specific kinship figure. This new memory may be developed over several sessions in a number of steps. In the Pesso approach we don’t change our history; however, we do change our response to our history, leading to a new perspective. 

    The way is opened to possibilities of greater pleasure, satisfaction, meaning, integration and connectedness.

     



    Deborah has worked as a Performance Coach for over 16 years having trained with Coach U. Her background is in the arts as an actor, theatre director and artistic director. She has worked with a wide range of people from all walks of life. Having first encountered Pesso Boyden as a client, she felt inspired to do the training herself. Since graduating in 2013 she has been running Personal Development workshops using the Pesso Boyden system and is now accredited by the official PBSP U.K. organisation.

    Notting Hill Therapist | Marcus Gottlieb Psychotherapist & Counsellor
    Marcus Gottlieb is a highly experienced London-based psychotherapist with a particular interest in boarding school survivor syndrome. Having trained alongside Deborah directly under Al Pesso and his closest collaborator Lowijs van Perquin, he is steeped in the work of PBSP and a strong believer in the client’s genetic impulse towards health and expression of their unique potential and individual destiny. He became an accredited Pesso Boyden therapist in 2021.
    Pesso Boyden Workshop with Ana María Ruiz Sancho and Marcus Gottlieb

     

    Pesso Boyden Therapy is a respectful and highly respected, body-based psychotherapy with distinctive techniques aimed at addressing entrenched issues. It is an interactive process that creates new body-based memories to heal emotional deficits of the past.

    An exceptionally powerful personal development tool, it uses feedback, systematic procedures, objects and role players in a unique methodology, in order to repair the early traumas, wounds and losses that can powerfully influence the brain’s map of the world.

    In shifting underlying perspectives, the way is opened to the possibility of greater pleasure, satisfaction, meaning and connectedness, and an enhanced freedom to effect longed-for changes.

    It is expected there will be between 8 and 12 participants, with an absolute maximum of 15. The day will start with an explanation of Pesso Boyden and an experiential introduction, followed by 4 actual client sessions of an hour each.

    Venue: Philadelphia Association, 4 Marty’s Yard, London NW3 1QW
    Date: Saturday 3 June 2017
    Time: 0930 to 1800
    Cost: £75

    Register Your Interest



    Ana María Ruiz Sancho is an experienced psychiatrist and a psychotherapist. She is also a specialist in group dynamics and an Institutional and Team Motivation Consultant.

    Ana is the Founder and a Director of VocAcción, as well as being a qualified Pesso Boyden psychotherapist.


    Notting Hill Therapist | Marcus Gottlieb Psychotherapist & Counsellor

    Marcus Gottlieb works with relationships, sexuality, abuse and trauma, with a particular interest in boarding school survivor syndrome. Qualified in Pesso Boyden as well as other psychotherapies, he is also an Alexander Technique teacher.

    An Introduction to the Pesso Boyden Method

     

    An opportunity to learn about and observe the distinctive techniques of this respectful body-based psychotherapy.

    Suitable for both psychologically interested professionals, people seeking personal development/CPD and for people not in the therapeutic professions seeking to address entrenched issues. For all those who are interested in living a larger life. A special price of £35 for the day includes lunch and refreshments. CPD certificates will be available.

    PBSP (Pesso-Boyden System Psychomotor) is a powerful, deeply respectful, psychotherapeutic process that uses feedback, ritual, objects and role players in a unique manner to heal the traumas, wounds and losses that affect our personal map of the world.

    Its central goal is the imaginative creation of an ‘ideal’ healthy past that a person’s brain processes so that they emerge feeling differently about themselves. As Albert Pesso said, ‘Humanity is responsible for the meaning that surrounds us. The task for each person is to create a meaningful life and then live it with existential courage and passion.’

    As well as gaining new perspectives, clients often experience increased pleasure, satisfaction, meaning and connectedness following a PBSP session and find themselves psychologically freer to make the changes they wish for in their lives.
    Date: Saturday 7 October 2017
    Venue: Notting Hill, London W11
    Time: 10.00 am – 4.30 pm
    Cost: £35 (inc lunch & refreshments)

     

    Register Your Interest


    Boarding School Survivor Syndrome Conference

    BOARDING SCHOOL: Surviving the Syndrome
    Broken Attachment and Childhood Trauma

    University of Brighton

    Saturday 9 September 2017
    9.30 am to 5.00 pm

    Conference for psychotherapists, counsellors, mental health workers, boarding school survivors and other interested people.

    Conference overall aims are to:
    § Present key aspects of what has been published about the psychological and other effects of boarding.
    § Explore helpful therapeutic approaches for clients who are former boarders.
    § Consider current research and a possible agenda for future research
    § Enable networking amongst those interested in this important topic

    Chair: Pam Howard, School of Applied Social Science, University of Brighton.

    Speakers: Nick Duffell, Joy Schaverien, Alex Renton, Thurstine Basset, Anni Townend, Olya Khaleelee.

    Group Discussion Facilitators: Marcus Gottlieb, Leslie Lund, Nicola Miller, Simon Partridge, Boarding Concern Directors.

    For more details, contact Laura Williams:
    southcoastevents@brighton.ac.uk