• Supervision with Marcus
  • Fees & Questions
  • About Marcus
  • How To Find
    & Contact Me
  • 07973 322 819
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Psychotherapy in West London
  • Therapy for Abuse Victims & Survivors
  • Work & Career Issues Therapy
  • Boarding School Survivors Therapy

Psychotherapy in West London

Psychotherapy & Counselling with Marcus Gottlieb

Bereavement Counselling in London

Therapy for grief or the loss of a loved one with Marcus

Bereavement is one of the most common reasons why people seek therapy. Many people have found bereavement counselling supportive when they are trying to cope with the grieving process.

Someone dying often arouses a mix of complex and difficult emotions. It is painful, even devastating, when someone significant dies. The death of a close person can be one of the most distressing experiences you will ever have: your love does not simply disappear when they die. Bereavement counselling or therapy is aimed at helping you come to terms with what has ‘hit’ you.

What is grief?

Grief is a natural, universal reaction to loss. As we all suffer bereavements or losses in the course of our lives, we will all encounter grief at some point. It is an ordinary and healthy part of life.

The form grief takes is very variable and personal. It used to be said that there are 5 stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance – but this certainly does not describe everyone’s journey through the grieving process.

Whatever your particular process is, understand that everyone reacts to bereavement differently and there is no ‘normal’ or ‘right’ way to experience grief.

As a Bereavement Counsellor I often hear these questions:

‘Why haven’t I cried?’ ‘Am I normal?’

or

‘Why haven’t I stopped crying yet?’

We all grieve in our own way and in our own time. It is a very individual matter, and there is no ‘proper’ way to do it and no predictable timeframe.

Possible, relevant factors include our own age, our past experiences of loss, our relationship to the person who has died, and the circumstances of their dying – was it a long illness? was it preventable? were they young? was it suicide, accident or death by natural causes?

Emotions triggered following a bereavement:

Emotions that can very often be triggered by an experience of bereavement are listed here. Some people don’t feel any of them with any great intensity. Others feel them deeply, or move between them rapidly, which can feel like mood swings and can be quite alarming (though these too are ‘normal’). Other people can feel ‘stuck’ in one particular emotional state.

  • Guilt, regret: people often ruminate over what they did or didn’t say or do before the person died.
  • Shock, disbelief: the reality of the death may feel like it isn’t sinking in.
  • Sadness, loneliness: that companionship has vanished, along with hopes or expectations you had for the future; there is a whole new world to adapt to, whilst your friends might not understand, or you feel you don’t want to ‘burden’ them.
  • Anger: people are sometimes angry with the person who has ‘abandoned’ them, and death itself seems, from one perspective, to be a cruel injustice (instead of a normal part of life).
  • Stress, pain: bereavement can trigger all sorts of pain and stress reactions, both physical and emotional.
  • Relief: realistically speaking, dying often comes as a relief, whether to the person who has died or to the bereaved.

“Thank you for your patience, understanding and guidance – it has truly been the main vehicle for getting me through this tough experience.” – M.

What helps you cope with bereavement?

Bereaved people are often more resilient than they realise. Bereavement Counselling can help you appreciate and make sense of your reactions. There are four broad types of reaction to bereavement:

  • For many people, following a death, it is very important as quickly as possible to get back a sense of family and community. There is a process of re-grouping and normalising that needs to be gone through. Organising a fitting funeral and wake, and perhaps a memorial service, will be important steps in healing and recovery.
  • For others, a key priority is to preserve the memory of the loved one. They will be looking at photographs with the family and exchanging stories and memories, especially with the children of the next generation, and this may go on for a long time.
  • Other people find true solace in helping those who suffer from the same medical condition that caused their loved one’s death. They find a way to give meaning to what has happened, and this at the same time helps them through their grief.
  • For others, meaning is given to their lives through their religious, philosophical or spiritual beliefs.

Many people naturally fit into more than one of these models of mourning and grief. What all of these reactions have in common is:

  1. people are experiencing the normal effects of human loss and bereavement,
  2. time does lessen the intensity of grief, eventually, for everyone,
  3. rituals of many types help us to mark the stages of our personal grief process and work through our feelings.

“Though there is little joy to be found in it, still death is not a monstrous evil that drags us off to some unimaginably terrible place. It is an event, a part of life, the end of further possibilities, a neutral event. The fact of death bestows a special poignancy, a bittersweet quality, to life’s activities.” Irvin Yalom, professor of psychiatry

How does Bereavement Counselling help?

Many people have found that sharing their feelings and their grieving process with an experienced and warmly empathic bereavement counsellor helps them understand and resolve their grief. Therapists, like Marcus, witness and accompany you on your grieving journey to support your recovery and healing and help you, in your own time, to reach a sense of acceptance and readiness to move on.

Bereavement Counselling in London with Marcus

Take the first step and contact Marcus to discuss Bereavement and Grief Counselling.

 

Contact Marcus


Some helpful articles and web pages on Bereavement, Grief and Loss

Cruise
Cruse Bereavement Care is the leading national charity for bereaved people in England, Wales and Northern Ireland.
They offer help and advice through the process of bereavement.
www.cruse.org.uk

Sheryl Sandberg
A moving piece written by Sherly Sandberg explores the her emotions following the death of her husband. Read the full article

Juliet Rosenfeld
Juliet Rosenfeld’s husband died suddenly a year ago during treatment for cancer. She describes her struggle to absorb the brutal fact of his death. Read the full Guardian article

Stephen Jenkinson: GriefWalker
“Trailer for a Canadian documentary of Stephen Jenkinson’s work with dying people, asking ‘What does it take to fall in love with being alive?’ The answer comes, ‘Being willing to see the end of what you love’. Other questions explored are, Has it always been this hard to die? What do dying people fear most? When do you really begin to die, and what are you supposed to do then? How is it that grief is a skill, something to be learned and practiced?”

Primary Sidebar

West London Psychotherapist with Client | Notting Hill Therapy

I Often Work With Issues or Difficulties in the Following Areas

  • Abuse, Trauma & PTSD
  • Addictions, Obsessions & Compulsive Behaviour
  • Anger & Anger Issues
  • Anxiety & Panic Attacks
  • Bereavement, Grief & Loss
  • Boarding School Survivors Therapy
  • Body Image & Body Hatred
  • Bullying & Harassment
  • CBT West London
  • Couples Counselling
  • Depression & Mood Swings
  • Eating Disorders & Intuitive Eating
  • Family Issues & Challenges of Parenting
  • Gay Couples Therapy
  • Groups & Workshops
  • Low Self-Confidence & Lack of Self Esteem
  • LGBTQ, Sexual Identity & Sexual Orientation
  • Midlife Crisis, Ageing & Life Transitions
  • Pesso Boyden Therapy (PBSP)
  • Psychosomatic Symptoms – IBS, ME, Eczema, Migraine
  • Relationship Counselling
  • Sexual Difficulties, Sexual Obsessions & Addictions
  • Sleep Disorders, Insomnia & Relaxation
  • Social Anxiety & Other Phobias or Fears
  • Stress, Overwhelm & Burnout
  • Work, Career & Difficult Professional Relationships

Footer

Psychotherapy & Counselling in West London

  • Psychotherapy in West London
  • Therapy for Abuse Victims & Survivors
  • Work & Career Issues Therapy
  • Boarding School Survivors Therapy

Professional Registration & Accreditation

Marcus Gottlieb BACP Professional Psychotherapy Registration

Practical Information

  • Full List Of Site Pages
  • Terms and Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Your Questions & My Answers
  • Practice Location & Contacting Me

© 2022 Marcus Gottlieb ·

· Notting Hill Therapy ·
· 67 Tabor Road, Hammersmith, London, W6 0BN ·
· Phone: 07973 322 819
£95 - £140
·
· Site Map · Site Build & SEO Webtime ·

MENU
  • Home
  • Psychotherapy in West London
    • Abuse & Trauma
    • Addictions & Obsessive Behaviour
    • Anger & Anger Issues
    • Anxiety & Panic Attacks
    • Behaviour Change
    • Bereavement, Grief & Loss
    • Body Image Issues & Body Hatred
    • Bullying & Harassment
    • CBT West London
    • Couples Counselling
    • Depression & Mood Swings
    • Eating Disorders & Intuitive Eating
    • Family Issues & Challenges of Parenting
    • Gay Couples Therapy
    • Groups & Workshops
    • Low Self Confidence & Low self Esteem
    • LGBTQ & Sexual Orientation
    • Midlife Crisis, Ageing & Life Transitions
    • Pesso Boyden Therapy
    • Psychosomatic Symptoms – IBS, ME, Eczema, Migraine
    • Relationship Counselling
    • Sexual Difficulties, Obsessions & Addictions
    • Sleep Disorders, Insomnia and Relaxation
    • Social Anxiety & Other Phobias or Fears
    • Stress, Overwhelm & Burnout
    • Work & Career Issues
  • Abuse & Trauma Therapy
    • Therapy for Adult Victims of Childhood Abuse
    • Male victims of domestic violence
    • Therapy for Abusive Relationships
    • Boarding School Survivors Therapy
  • Boarding School Survivors Therapy
    • Boarding School Survivors & Relationship Issues
    • Boarding School Survivors & Bullying
    • Boarding School Survivors & Depression
    • Boarding School Survivors Workshops in London
  • Work & Career Issues Therapy
    • Assertiveness Skills Coaching
    • Bias, Prejudice & Discrimination
    • Bullying & Harassment at Work
    • Career Transition Coaching
    • Work & Life Balance Counselling
  • Supervision for Psychotherapists
  • FAQ
  • About Marcus
  • Contact
  • London Therapy & Counselling
Pesso Boyden Group with accredited practitioners Deborah Clarke and Marcus Gottlieb

Pesso Boyden Group with accredited PBSP practitioners Deborah Clarke and Marcus Gottlieb

Pesso Boyden Therapy (‘PBSP’) is a philosophical process for becoming whole.

It is a respectful, interactive group process that heals by embedding new memories in the brain and in the body

Most people consciously or unconsciously have memories – explicit or implicit – of 

1. deficits 

2. traumas 

3. having to take care of others when we were too young – e.g. protecting a sibling, providing the joy in the life of an unhappy parent, unconsciously becoming the ‘spouse’ of a widowed parent, or making the world right after hearing stories of injustice. 

When any of these three categories of memory appear in the client’s work, the client and therapist work together to externalise them, in order to illuminate the client’s ways of handling life and to facilitate change. The client is always in charge of this process – people and incidents from the client’s past will be symbolised in the here-and-now either by people in the group or by objects in the room, all chosen and placed by the client. 

The therapist then works with the client to facilitate an antidote to what happened in the past – a new memory which provides what the client needed at that particular time in their past, from a specific kinship figure. This new memory may be developed over several sessions in a number of steps. In the Pesso approach we don’t change our history; however, we do change our response to our history, leading to a new perspective. 

The way is opened to possibilities of greater pleasure, satisfaction, meaning, integration and connectedness.

 



Deborah has worked as a Performance Coach for over 16 years having trained with Coach U. Her background is in the arts as an actor, theatre director and artistic director. She has worked with a wide range of people from all walks of life. Having first encountered Pesso Boyden as a client, she felt inspired to do the training herself. Since graduating in 2013 she has been running Personal Development workshops using the Pesso Boyden system and is now accredited by the official PBSP U.K. organisation.

Notting Hill Therapist | Marcus Gottlieb Psychotherapist & Counsellor
Marcus Gottlieb is a highly experienced London-based psychotherapist with a particular interest in boarding school survivor syndrome. Having trained alongside Deborah directly under Al Pesso and his closest collaborator Lowijs van Perquin, he is steeped in the work of PBSP and a strong believer in the client’s genetic impulse towards health and expression of their unique potential and individual destiny. He became an accredited Pesso Boyden therapist in 2021.
An Introduction to the Pesso Boyden Method

 

An opportunity to learn about and observe the distinctive techniques of this respectful body-based psychotherapy.

Suitable for both psychologically interested professionals, people seeking personal development/CPD and for people not in the therapeutic professions seeking to address entrenched issues. For all those who are interested in living a larger life. A special price of £35 for the day includes lunch and refreshments. CPD certificates will be available.

PBSP (Pesso-Boyden System Psychomotor) is a powerful, deeply respectful, psychotherapeutic process that uses feedback, ritual, objects and role players in a unique manner to heal the traumas, wounds and losses that affect our personal map of the world.

Its central goal is the imaginative creation of an ‘ideal’ healthy past that a person’s brain processes so that they emerge feeling differently about themselves. As Albert Pesso said, ‘Humanity is responsible for the meaning that surrounds us. The task for each person is to create a meaningful life and then live it with existential courage and passion.’

As well as gaining new perspectives, clients often experience increased pleasure, satisfaction, meaning and connectedness following a PBSP session and find themselves psychologically freer to make the changes they wish for in their lives.
Date: Saturday 7 October 2017
Venue: Notting Hill, London W11
Time: 10.00 am – 4.30 pm
Cost: £35 (inc lunch & refreshments)

 

Register Your Interest


Boarding School Survivor Syndrome Conference

BOARDING SCHOOL: Surviving the Syndrome
Broken Attachment and Childhood Trauma

University of Brighton

Saturday 9 September 2017
9.30 am to 5.00 pm

Conference for psychotherapists, counsellors, mental health workers, boarding school survivors and other interested people.

Conference overall aims are to:
§ Present key aspects of what has been published about the psychological and other effects of boarding.
§ Explore helpful therapeutic approaches for clients who are former boarders.
§ Consider current research and a possible agenda for future research
§ Enable networking amongst those interested in this important topic

Chair: Pam Howard, School of Applied Social Science, University of Brighton.

Speakers: Nick Duffell, Joy Schaverien, Alex Renton, Thurstine Basset, Anni Townend, Olya Khaleelee.

Group Discussion Facilitators: Marcus Gottlieb, Leslie Lund, Nicola Miller, Simon Partridge, Boarding Concern Directors.

For more details, contact Laura Williams:
southcoastevents@brighton.ac.uk

Pesso Boyden Workshop with Ana María Ruiz Sancho and Marcus Gottlieb

 

Pesso Boyden Therapy is a respectful and highly respected, body-based psychotherapy with distinctive techniques aimed at addressing entrenched issues. It is an interactive process that creates new body-based memories to heal emotional deficits of the past.

An exceptionally powerful personal development tool, it uses feedback, systematic procedures, objects and role players in a unique methodology, in order to repair the early traumas, wounds and losses that can powerfully influence the brain’s map of the world.

In shifting underlying perspectives, the way is opened to the possibility of greater pleasure, satisfaction, meaning and connectedness, and an enhanced freedom to effect longed-for changes.

It is expected there will be between 8 and 12 participants, with an absolute maximum of 15. The day will start with an explanation of Pesso Boyden and an experiential introduction, followed by 4 actual client sessions of an hour each.

Venue: Philadelphia Association, 4 Marty’s Yard, London NW3 1QW
Date: Saturday 3 June 2017
Time: 0930 to 1800
Cost: £75

Register Your Interest



Ana María Ruiz Sancho is an experienced psychiatrist and a psychotherapist. She is also a specialist in group dynamics and an Institutional and Team Motivation Consultant.

Ana is the Founder and a Director of VocAcción, as well as being a qualified Pesso Boyden psychotherapist.


Notting Hill Therapist | Marcus Gottlieb Psychotherapist & Counsellor

Marcus Gottlieb works with relationships, sexuality, abuse and trauma, with a particular interest in boarding school survivor syndrome. Qualified in Pesso Boyden as well as other psychotherapies, he is also an Alexander Technique teacher.

Contact Marcus

Hello and thanks for making contact.

Either fill out the form below or you can call me or email me.